tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post8647568594010079283..comments2023-10-06T15:59:44.389+03:00Comments on Shearim: Should a Baal Teshuva give up the contact to his ParentsMiriam Woelkehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-78593424393563688622013-04-25T14:08:20.661+03:002013-04-25T14:08:20.661+03:00B"H
No one should reject anyone. Whether Ref...B"H<br /><br />No one should reject anyone. Whether Reform educated children do Teshuva or whether the parents decide doing Teshuva !<br /><br />It is very important for both sides to work out a way where both parties can live with. It goes without saying that the Teshuva side will not eat in the Reform sides non - kosher kitchen. Even if there is a kosher kitchen, the Teshuva side may have its own specific Halchot for keeping kosher. Meaning that a kosher kitchen is not always a kosher kitchen for everybody else.<br /><br />This should not be taken as an offence and I know many frum Jews who would never eat in my kitchen. I also know frummies who don't even eat anywhere outside but only in their homes.<br /><br />How far should each side go ?<br /><br />I think that it is important to sit together finding a compromise each side is happy with. Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-77995250200807024322013-04-23T18:56:39.885+03:002013-04-23T18:56:39.885+03:00Should Reform educated adult children reject their...Should Reform educated adult children reject their parents when the parents become Baal Teshuva? How far is the daughter-in-law (whose mother is a Reform Cantor) suppose to go to accomadate her unbending in-laws?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-58110053669204587322009-07-02T12:44:08.213+03:002009-07-02T12:44:08.213+03:00B"H
This is not a lesson but a realistic vie...B"H<br /><br />This is not a lesson but a realistic view. People joining the religious society usually know about these issues.Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-11199216668321803212009-07-02T12:31:43.573+03:002009-07-02T12:31:43.573+03:00I can speak from experience. I knew my family and ...I can speak from experience. I knew my family and friends would not fit into society when I came to Israel, so I waited until my children were on their own. My family respected my decision. When I visit I bring my own utensils and keep kosher--a bit fussy, but do-able. I pray that my children will be affected by my actions. No, the two societies don't mix, but with planning an a bit of effort it is possible to honor the ones who birthed and raised you. One last thought, by shunning them, what are you teaching them about frum society? It surely is not a positive lesson.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-62485791861377791972009-07-02T12:13:48.911+03:002009-07-02T12:13:48.911+03:00B"H
Oh, maybe I should go back to sleep.:-)B"H<br /><br />Oh, maybe I should go back to sleep.:-)Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-65605387030038333712009-07-02T12:05:47.944+03:002009-07-02T12:05:47.944+03:00No I meant the comment:
"I find it really sa...No I meant the comment:<br /><br />"I find it really sad that you would even ask this question Miriam."<br /><br />this is judgemental.<br /><br />lolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-65403710400095950692009-07-02T11:47:19.081+03:002009-07-02T11:47:19.081+03:00B"H
Just like in every other society ...B"H<br /><br />Just like in every other society ...Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-76346831834497335692009-07-02T11:22:35.080+03:002009-07-02T11:22:35.080+03:00I find it really sad that people are so judgementa...I find it really sad that people are so judgemental.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-76430128548149449232009-07-02T07:22:18.376+03:002009-07-02T07:22:18.376+03:00B"H
I wasn't talking about myself but de...B"H<br /><br />I wasn't talking about myself but described the situation of many Baalei Teshuva.Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-43326441124578104172009-07-02T07:17:09.088+03:002009-07-02T07:17:09.088+03:00I find it really sad that you would even ask this ...I find it really sad that you would even ask this question Miriam. These are the people who put you into this world. Sure there are problems, but you find a way to deal with it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-7994440025653437562009-07-01T15:51:44.391+03:002009-07-01T15:51:44.391+03:00my friend was also saying the "new generation...my friend was also saying the "new generation" are much more open and that before it was much harder to come to Satmar. <br /><br />I guess Mear Sharim is the absoulte most extreme and that's why it's more closed<br /><br />Generally I find Satmar very nice and open people.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-85070674874515637792009-07-01T14:39:55.419+03:002009-07-01T14:39:55.419+03:00B"H
Even Satmar in Bnei Brak differs a littl...B"H<br /><br />Even Satmar in Bnei Brak differs a little from Mea Shearim. <br />In Bnei Brak I found them quite open when I went to Rebbe Aharon's Tish.Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-4604360944282448692009-07-01T14:37:04.359+03:002009-07-01T14:37:04.359+03:00Yes for sure Satmar don't follow the Rebbe(s) ...Yes for sure Satmar don't follow the Rebbe(s) as staunchly as TA or TAY.<br /><br />It's a fascinating subject. Also wonder if groups outside of the Mear Sharim bubble are more laid back.... maybe London Satmar and Mear Sharim Satmar have different levels of intensity?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-8709894313526010542009-07-01T14:32:43.555+03:002009-07-01T14:32:43.555+03:00B"H
I've heard about a convert to Judais...B"H<br /><br />I've heard about a convert to Judaism, joining Satmar in Jerusalem and cutting off any contact to his parents.<br /><br />As far as I understood from the Belzer, they (or at least) would tolerate too much contact with the parents.<br /><br />The TA as well as the Toldot Avraham Yitzchak would definitely not accept such a behaviour. I think that when you join those groups, your whole behaviour has to be very different anyway.<br />Compared to them, Satmar is probably easy going.Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-35092421973460685802009-07-01T14:28:51.491+03:002009-07-01T14:28:51.491+03:00you know i have born jewish friends with gentile c...you know i have born jewish friends with gentile children - imagine bringnig them over for dinner at the TA lol<br /><br />I can imagine it's hard for them to understand...but if it's just a phone call once a week - they don't need to know lol<br /><br />I know a Satmar BT who has been in the community 20 or 25 yrs, very well known etc and visits his non religious family every so often. And this guy is actually more hardcore than some of the born satmars I know lolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-89460444191969754772009-07-01T14:24:59.026+03:002009-07-01T14:24:59.026+03:00B"H
You are right but when I spoke to the Ch...B"H<br /><br />You are right but when I spoke to the Chassid, I got the feeling that it is very hard getting the message over to someone born into the society. <br /><br />I think that the more extreme the group is, the less they want you to maintain contact. I am thinking here of the Toldot Aharon or maybe even Satmar.Miriam Woelkehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627379693165339825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1451958387969081740.post-48652694223816399852009-07-01T14:16:49.432+03:002009-07-01T14:16:49.432+03:00I agree with you that contact should be maintained...I agree with you that contact should be maintained on a limited basis and that if the BT/gair is serious it won't be company they want to keep anyway.<br /><br />However I do believe a phone call every so often, to the parents for BT and gairim is a kiddush HaShem.<br /><br />I do not think it would be OK to send the kids off to the secular/gentile grandparents as the atmosphere and surroundings would not be kosher. The BT/gair would need to be there to supervise.<br /><br />However, meeting them for a walk in the park and asking them to dress modestly, etc... I think thats fine.<br /><br />IF the person is so weak to be effected negativly by his parents then perhaps another option is in order.<br /><br />However, for a regular person, whos parents are understanding, I think it would be unfair to never speak to them again.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com