Too much in Haredi Society ?

B"H

To be honest, I was intending to write about something completely different but I just had this, well, rather disturbing experience. So, I am bothering you with that and maybe someone has the RIGHT halachic answer.

Before I start telling this particular incident, I have to say that although I am not running around in a skirt all the time, I do agree with haredi Judaism. I agree to an extend of letting me not feel comfortable in a national religious synagogue. Especially not when the rabbi or the national religious community members are involved in haredi bashing, such as many "modern - Orthodox" communities in Jerusalem.

When I do go to a synagogue, it will be to 99 % a haredi one. No matter it litvish or chassidish. Furthermore, I cannot stand this national religious, Carlebach or whatever "Flower Power Style" such as freaky hippie clothes and waving the arms around while singing or praying; nor am I into special women's prayers.

I may be modern but I certainly do have a "fanatic" haredi side.

The incident just happened:

I wanted to sit on a chair in order to do something and a woman sitting in a public place was already occupying another chair nearby. Obviously she had put her plastic shopping bag onto the chair beside her. I asked her if the bag belongs to her, as then she may have taken it away because I wanted to sit on the other chair.

The modern - religious (Orthodox ?) "Flower Power" woman said that the bag doesn't belong to her.

I removed the "ownerless" bag for a few minutes from the chair in order to sit on it. Less than five minutes and while getting up, I put the plastic bag back on its former place.

During these five minutes the woman asked me to apologize to her because I had accused / assumed that the bag belongs to her.

I was stunned and said that there is nothing to apologize. I had just asked her with the intention that, if the bag belongs to her, she may take it away so that I can sit on the chair.

Then she started quoting me a certain Halacha that it is forbidden to accuse someone.

I responded that I didn't accuse her of anything and that there is nothing to apologize. I had just asked.

________________________

I do have a problem with two things occuring here:

1. I am having problems taking a Halacha from this "Flower Power" woman because she is just not my religious style. Not that I want to sound arrogant but her thing (women's prayers and hippie) is just not for me.

2. Why do people have to go into every single little detail ?

I was asking a question and didn't just throw the bag off the chair.

If this had happened to me and there was such a Halacha, I would not bother another person with this and don't demand an apology. Simple because someone asked a question.