Sunday, October 28, 2012

Tehillim YES, Household NO


A national religious Israeli woman from Zfat told me the following story last week:

There are quite a few Taliban women living in the southern part of Zfat. There, where rents are still affordable but many people are still on the dole. 

The women like to sit outside in front of their houses. Almost every afternoon, if the weather is nice, those women sit together for a chat. 

They try to be so terribly holy but when it comes to their household and children, they are suddenly not that ambitious anymore. 

Once a certain well - respected Rabbi came to Zfat. He wanted to give a Shiur to religious women and all those women, including the Taliban, were anxiously waiting him. While they were waiting in a big hall, the Rabbi passed a house on his way to the hall. He heard children screaming and asked where their mother was. The children answered that their mother had gone to the Shiur of a famous Rabbi who was supposed to come. 

The entire time until this particular woman came home, the Rabbi took care of the kids. The women were waiting and waiting for the Rabbi and when he didn't show up, they decided to go home.

Also the woman came home and found the Rabbi watching her kids. He told her that taking care of children is more important than coming to his Shiur. 

Some of the religious woman who want to be so holy are not that holy when it comes to Be'in Adam le'Chavero or even their own children. Pushing oneself a little less right into the front in order to be the first in line before the Kadosh Baruch Hu couldn't hurt and the children of those women would be much happier.


  1. BS"D
    I have SOOOOO much to say on this subject, but will try hard to refrain (and write to you privately).
    I will say - I know personally the women you mention as I lived in Tzfat for 5 years and seemed to attract these women. The ones I know - their houses are NOT a mess. They are clean, tidy enough, decent.
    And while my husband, Rav Yehudah Alfasi, a Rosh Yeshivah and Mekubal, doesn't agree that women go to shiurim for this reason (and others) i wonder if there wasn't something else going on?
    Typically there and here in Tiberias (where we now live), kids are outside much MUCH later than I would think is good chinuch, but that's what Israelis seem to do. I assure you, if this story is true, there were PLENTY of other kids outside that same night. I know, I lived both in the darom, Rosco, and center and it's hard to fall asleep on warm nights with them all outside on their loud "Bimbas" and other wheelie things.

    I realize the garb is highly HIGHLY problematic, but it isn't the CAUSE of what this rav saw. It's the outcome of particular Ravs and women who have a desire to be MORE than (yes, not tznuah at all) that drives them and promote this, These ravs write books in which they promote a "We all have to look like Sarah Imeinu" thing and that all other forms of tznuis - aren't, that are seriously confusing these women. And since they now imagine themselves to be a rabbanit, they imagine they're actually inspiring us all to "strengthen" our tzniut.

    I could write volumes on this, as again, I know them well personally - but one thing I will say is that I don't know ONE woman who covers like that who's husband agrees and THAT is their biggest mistake. I may post myself on this, but try to avoid lashon hara.
    And BTW: your mentioning that the other women were NR, is rather pointless, since it implies mainstream chareidi women would condone them, and are just one cape headcovering away from following suit, which isn't the case at all.

    NOTE: These are all women who were VERY anti-chareidi, who are now VERY anti-hilluni, fyi.

  2. B"H

    The national religious woman told me the story in the middle of the street and definitely made her point regarding certain haredi (probably Ba'alei Teshuva) women.

    When I mentioned the story about a particular woman going to a Shiur and leaving her kids, I am using this as an example in order to express that there are quite a few of this kind:

    Ba'alot Teshuva women who suddenly want to be so "holy".

    There is nothing wrong with searching for a Chizuk but one shouldn't forget about reality and his environment.

    No matter if narional religious, haredi or even Carlebach style, some women as well as men take their sudden Frumigkeit to a certain extreme.