B"H
The simple interpretation of the "Neshama Yeterah" is that it is an additional soul every Jew receives on Shabbat. According to the Talmud and some commentators, a Jew receives this soul every Friday night and according to other opinions, a Jew receives this kind of soul already on Wednesdays.
The most general opinion is, however, that the Neshama Yeterah enters on Friday night and leaves the Jew on Mozzaei Shabbat (right after Shabbat is over).
Nevertheless, the Neshama Yeterah is not an easy subject to understand let alone to write about. Kabbalah has further ideas about the additional soul, but here I only want to talk about the general opinion which is "the additional soul on Shabbat".
In the Gemara in Talmud Taanit 27b you can find a highly interesting discussion. Basically the Gemara is talking about fasting but mentions something else as well. We hear about the Nazareans who mostly used to live in the Galilee in northern Israel. The Nazareans were halachic Jews who kept all the Torah laws but additionally saw Mr. J. as their Meshiach. The Meshiach believe was the only difference to other Jews who did not believe in any J. – stories.
Historically, people from the Galilee were mostly living in villages and not too educated. Furthermore, it was always the north of Israel which was very much into messianic ideas and no wonder that J. came from there.
When J. was walking around and preaching, the uneducated type of Jew from the north believed him and this is why he was quite successful there. In cities, however, he could never gain any majority because J. had to face the educated type of Jew.
After J. died, his followers kept all the Jewish Halachot except but additionally saw him as the Meshiach. They never thought about giving up the Halachot and if someone had told them that once there will be a person called Paul denying anything halachic, they would have been shocked.
The Talmud in Taanit 27b discusses a very interesting subject. Rabbi Reish Lakish cannot understand why the later followers of J. changed the Shabbat from a Saturday into a Sunday. This is absolutely ridiculous, as the additional soul enters a Jew on Friday night. On Saturday night, it leaves him already.
So why turn the original Shabbat into a Sunday ? The change into a Sunday is totally absurd and doesn’t make any sense.The Nazareans were definitely no great talmudic scholars.
If you look into Talmud Sofrim 17:5, you can see the same passage but with one difference. There the Nazareans are called Christians.
Why there and not in Taanit ?
Especially during the Middle Ages, the church forced the Jews to take out whole passages from the Talmud. Not too many passages talk about J. and Christians anyway but the church considered other idol worship subjects discussed in the Talmud as talking about J. This is one of their misunderstandings of the whole Talmud, as the Talmud Bavli (Babylonian Talmud) for instance, mostly referred to Roman and Babylonian idol worship and not to Christianity at all.
During the Middle Ages and also later, the church was obsessed with keeping its worldwide power and could not take the risk of something against their claims being published.
The former forbidden passages from the Talmud are to be found in the so – called Hashmatot and many Talmud editions have put those passages back anyway.
_________________
I have published the same article in my German blog and one reader suggested that the Shabbat was changed into a Sunday because the Christians wanted to make it easier for idol worshipers to adjust. In history, many idol worshipers kept the Sunday as a weekly holiday and wouldn't have been willing to give it up when converting to Christianity.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
Latest Missionary Attacks
B"H
Yad Le'Achim's latest warnings against missionary activities in Israel:
Christian missionaries are not ashamed to exploit the desparate situation in Sderot
http://www.yadlachimusa.org.il/Index.asp?ArticleID=596&CategoryID=192
Planned Evangelical village at the Kinneret
http://www.yadlachimusa.org.il/Index.asp?ArticleID=593&CategoryID=192
Yad Le'Achim's latest warnings against missionary activities in Israel:
Christian missionaries are not ashamed to exploit the desparate situation in Sderot
http://www.yadlachimusa.org.il/Index.asp?ArticleID=596&CategoryID=192
Planned Evangelical village at the Kinneret
http://www.yadlachimusa.org.il/Index.asp?ArticleID=593&CategoryID=192
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Mishkenot HaRoim
B"H
Below you can look at the only, so far, existing picture of the Mishkenot HaRoim in the Mea Shearim neighbourhood. The Mishkenot HaRoim are members of the Edah HaCharedit and keep themselves rather as a secret.
In the middle: Rabbi Avraham Yitzchak Ullmann of the Edah HaCharedit (Chassidut Dushinsky). To the left is the Rebbe of the Mishkenot HaRoim: Rabbi Chaim Rabinovitz.
Below you can look at the only, so far, existing picture of the Mishkenot HaRoim in the Mea Shearim neighbourhood. The Mishkenot HaRoim are members of the Edah HaCharedit and keep themselves rather as a secret.
In the middle: Rabbi Avraham Yitzchak Ullmann of the Edah HaCharedit (Chassidut Dushinsky). To the left is the Rebbe of the Mishkenot HaRoim: Rabbi Chaim Rabinovitz.
Yentl and the Progress
B"H
Who doesn't remember the movie "Yentl" with Barbara Streisand ? The young Jewish woman Yentl goes to a marketplace of her small chassidic town and and finds a stand where books are being sold. Instead of looking through cooking books or other books concerning womens' issues, she looks through books about Talmudic studies. The owner of the stand runs up to her and sends her to the side with the cooking books.
This situation took place about a hundred years ago but it wasn't unusual at all to find this anywhere in the haredi world until a few years ago. Suddenly many things have changed and more and more Jewish religious (national religious and haredi) are participating in classes for higher Jewish studies. If it is Talmud, Jewish philosophy or even Kabbalah, women are everywhere nowadays. At least in Jerusalem.
The last Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Shneerson, was almost the only chassidic Rebbe emphasizing Talmud studies for women. The Chassidut Breslov claims to be quite open but doesn't offer too many Talmudic studies for women but rather specialize in kabbalistic studies. Or, at least, teach women the stories of Rabbi Nachman on a very high level. But not only Chabad and Breslov seem to catch up, also the litvshe movement is very active. Women Yeshivot like Nishmat or Shearim teach lots of Gemara and offer Chavruta.
I don't really know the historical background when the Jewish mens' world got the idea that a woman should study less and if they do, then only some easier Torah concepts. A little Rashi here, some Tehillim there. Enough.
But when you look back into Jewish history you will find many important Torah educated women. Just look at our foremothers Sarah, Rivka (Rebbeka), Leah and Rachel. They were even on a level of a prophet.
Yael, Deborah and Hulda from the time of the Kings followed suit. Not to forget the daughter of the Talmudic Rabbi Me'ir: Beruriah. And last but not least, Rashi's daughter or Adel (Udel), the daughter of the Baal Shem Tov. Not the son of the Baal Shem Tov, Zvi, took over his father's position. It was Adel who was the intelligent one in the family and later gave birth to intellectual children who became well – known Chassidim.
Today there are countless courses for women. There is hardly a subject one cannot learn about. Many women even founded their own institutions and started teaching. With success, as there is a high demand.
Slowly, slowly, even the chassidic society is undergoing some changes. Chabad and Breslov are only the beginning. However, for the women from Vishnitz, Satmar, Belz, Toldot Aharon, this doesn't really apply so far. The men's world would not allow them higher Jewish studies, and I could list many reasons for this.
Let's look at it from the women's side: Too many men are afraid that a woman might get "too" educated and eventually knows more than her husband. What if it turns out that the husband is not the great Torah scholar he always claimed to be ? Should he get mad and be ashamed of himself ?
I think that the wife might take it much easier than her Macho husband. Especially the Mea Shearim Edah HaCharedit could be worried about women studying higher issues. Doesn't this automatically lead to rebellion ?
These are thoughts only a man can think of. Eventually all chassidic will change a bit, as women will not always keep quiet. And by the way, many men even prefer an educated women.
If a group like Toldot Aharon would announce today that courses for higher Jewish learning are available, do you know how many of their women would run and participate in such classes ? The room would be packed.
Let's bet.
Who doesn't remember the movie "Yentl" with Barbara Streisand ? The young Jewish woman Yentl goes to a marketplace of her small chassidic town and and finds a stand where books are being sold. Instead of looking through cooking books or other books concerning womens' issues, she looks through books about Talmudic studies. The owner of the stand runs up to her and sends her to the side with the cooking books.
This situation took place about a hundred years ago but it wasn't unusual at all to find this anywhere in the haredi world until a few years ago. Suddenly many things have changed and more and more Jewish religious (national religious and haredi) are participating in classes for higher Jewish studies. If it is Talmud, Jewish philosophy or even Kabbalah, women are everywhere nowadays. At least in Jerusalem.
The last Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Shneerson, was almost the only chassidic Rebbe emphasizing Talmud studies for women. The Chassidut Breslov claims to be quite open but doesn't offer too many Talmudic studies for women but rather specialize in kabbalistic studies. Or, at least, teach women the stories of Rabbi Nachman on a very high level. But not only Chabad and Breslov seem to catch up, also the litvshe movement is very active. Women Yeshivot like Nishmat or Shearim teach lots of Gemara and offer Chavruta.
I don't really know the historical background when the Jewish mens' world got the idea that a woman should study less and if they do, then only some easier Torah concepts. A little Rashi here, some Tehillim there. Enough.
But when you look back into Jewish history you will find many important Torah educated women. Just look at our foremothers Sarah, Rivka (Rebbeka), Leah and Rachel. They were even on a level of a prophet.
Yael, Deborah and Hulda from the time of the Kings followed suit. Not to forget the daughter of the Talmudic Rabbi Me'ir: Beruriah. And last but not least, Rashi's daughter or Adel (Udel), the daughter of the Baal Shem Tov. Not the son of the Baal Shem Tov, Zvi, took over his father's position. It was Adel who was the intelligent one in the family and later gave birth to intellectual children who became well – known Chassidim.
Today there are countless courses for women. There is hardly a subject one cannot learn about. Many women even founded their own institutions and started teaching. With success, as there is a high demand.
Slowly, slowly, even the chassidic society is undergoing some changes. Chabad and Breslov are only the beginning. However, for the women from Vishnitz, Satmar, Belz, Toldot Aharon, this doesn't really apply so far. The men's world would not allow them higher Jewish studies, and I could list many reasons for this.
Let's look at it from the women's side: Too many men are afraid that a woman might get "too" educated and eventually knows more than her husband. What if it turns out that the husband is not the great Torah scholar he always claimed to be ? Should he get mad and be ashamed of himself ?
I think that the wife might take it much easier than her Macho husband. Especially the Mea Shearim Edah HaCharedit could be worried about women studying higher issues. Doesn't this automatically lead to rebellion ?
These are thoughts only a man can think of. Eventually all chassidic will change a bit, as women will not always keep quiet. And by the way, many men even prefer an educated women.
If a group like Toldot Aharon would announce today that courses for higher Jewish learning are available, do you know how many of their women would run and participate in such classes ? The room would be packed.
Let's bet.
Marathon through Mea Shearim
B"H
Weather was perfect; only cold but no rain. It was nice to take a walk through the streets of Mea Shearim last Erev Shabbat.
First I ended up with the Machlis family and their hundred guests for the regular Shabbat dinner. It was so packed that three tables on the porch outside had to be set up. My friends and me were lucky, as we succeeded in occupying a table next to the entrance door. Next to us sat a guy from Chabad who had two yellow Meschiach - stickers on his clothes. I don't know if he was one of the Meshichistim or not. I didn't ask him although during the meal, him and me had a great discussion about Chabad chassidut.
According to the Chabadnik, the group does plan many more activities in Germany. I cannot say that Chabad is too successful in Germany, as especially there the Jews bring forward too many prejudices against Chabad. German Jews see all Chabadnikkim automatically as Meshichistim without realizing that there are different movements inside Chabad.
I told the Chabadnik that especially Satmar rejects them because Chabad is too much into missionizing Jews. The Chabadnik laughed and said that this is very true. However, he gave me the Chabad concept about the whole missionizing matter. As we all know, every Jew has a special spark (Nizotz) in his soul connecting him to G - d. By missionizing, this Nizotz is being reawakened and thus the secular Jew can suddenly connect to his Creator. One Torah concept might be enough to reawaken the spark. And this is the task of Chabad.
Actually I was planning to take this Chabad couple with me for a chassidic Tish but somehow the two of them just disappeared. With a friend I went to the Dushinsky Tish first. In the past we hadn't been too lucky with the Tish at Dushinsky's. Either no Tish took place, the women were not allowed in or we came too late.
Last Erev Shabbat then we couldn't believe our fortune. There was a Tish and we even found a good place in the Ezrat Nashim in order to look down to the Chassidim and the Rebbe, Rabbi Yosef Zvi Dushinsky.
The Dushinsky Rebbe: Rabbi Yosef Zvi Dushinsky
I wasn't planning to stay for too long, as I had made up many plans for that night. However, I have to say that although Dushinsky does not have the best Niggunim (songs), they do have the greatest singers. It was more than listening to a professional choir. Next to the room where the Tish takes place, they built a new synagogue. We had a look into it from upstairs and if anyone wants to see a great synagogue should definitely go to Dushinsky. The Aron HaKodesh is huge and on its left side, two special wooden chairs are placed. The bigger one is obviously for the Rebbe and the smaller one seems to be for the second man in Chassidut Dushinsky: for Rabbi Avraham Yitzchak Ullmann. Rabbi Ullmann is one of the most important figures in the Edah HaCharedit.
After about half an hour we left and walked through Yoel Street into Mea Shearim. Our first destination was the synagogue of the secret Edah group "Mishkenot HaRoim". Usually their two doors are wide open and I though I might be lucky. The door to the left was obviously the men's entrance. There is another door on the right which seemed to be the women;s entrance. We were standing in front of the building and thinking to go in or not.
At the same moment, some litvishe Yeshiva guys showed up and opened the men's door. A Chassid came out and didn't want to let them inside. They had to leave and walked away. Of course, we thought that the same might also apply to us. We walked away as well but couldn't stop thinking about the open women's entrance door.
After 100 meters we decided to go back. Actually my friend was more brave than me. We came back to the building and another Chassid walked out. I asked him if the other door is the women's entrance. He looked at me that replied that they do not have a Tish. He said it and disappeared.
Well, I do not recommend to anyone doing the same as we did after the Chassid walked away. We just walked into the second door. We climbed up some stairs but suddenly saw man'e clothes hanging there. We weren't so sure if this was really a women's entrance and decided to leave. Everything rather looked like a total men's society inside. I will definitely go back and ask some people. The thing I can say is that all kinds of male members of different Edah groups were going in and out. But Edah members only !!!
The chassidic groups of Toldot Aharon and Avraham Yitzchak did not have a Tish that night. We heard that the Rebbe of Avraham Yitzchak, Rabbi Shmuel Yaakov Kahn, went on a vacation to Mexico and won't have a Tish for another few months. If this is right I am really asking myself why especially he is going away all the time. Doesn't he have to take care of his Chassidim ? And even if not, there are plenty of Chassidim who do not have much money and hardly make a living. Why then is a Rebbe allowed to travel and waste so much money for himself ? The Rebbes of Belz, Slonim Jerusalem, Kretchnif Jerusalem or Dushinsky are hardly traveling.
Rather spontaneously we decided to visit some synagogues instead. Usually everything is open in Mea Shearim on Friday night. However, last Erev Shabbat everything seemed to be abandoned and people apparently went to sleep early. The synagogues of Sadigora and Kaliv were closed. Tchernobyl was open and busy but, as usual, the women's entrance was locked. This forces us to come back during the daytime. Nevertheless, we had a great long walk and I was completely finished when I finally came home.
This Friday night we are going to the Maariv service. The doors won't be locked because thousands of Chassidim will be praying at this place. I am talking about the huge synagogue of Chassidut GUR.
Weather was perfect; only cold but no rain. It was nice to take a walk through the streets of Mea Shearim last Erev Shabbat.
First I ended up with the Machlis family and their hundred guests for the regular Shabbat dinner. It was so packed that three tables on the porch outside had to be set up. My friends and me were lucky, as we succeeded in occupying a table next to the entrance door. Next to us sat a guy from Chabad who had two yellow Meschiach - stickers on his clothes. I don't know if he was one of the Meshichistim or not. I didn't ask him although during the meal, him and me had a great discussion about Chabad chassidut.
According to the Chabadnik, the group does plan many more activities in Germany. I cannot say that Chabad is too successful in Germany, as especially there the Jews bring forward too many prejudices against Chabad. German Jews see all Chabadnikkim automatically as Meshichistim without realizing that there are different movements inside Chabad.
I told the Chabadnik that especially Satmar rejects them because Chabad is too much into missionizing Jews. The Chabadnik laughed and said that this is very true. However, he gave me the Chabad concept about the whole missionizing matter. As we all know, every Jew has a special spark (Nizotz) in his soul connecting him to G - d. By missionizing, this Nizotz is being reawakened and thus the secular Jew can suddenly connect to his Creator. One Torah concept might be enough to reawaken the spark. And this is the task of Chabad.
Actually I was planning to take this Chabad couple with me for a chassidic Tish but somehow the two of them just disappeared. With a friend I went to the Dushinsky Tish first. In the past we hadn't been too lucky with the Tish at Dushinsky's. Either no Tish took place, the women were not allowed in or we came too late.
Last Erev Shabbat then we couldn't believe our fortune. There was a Tish and we even found a good place in the Ezrat Nashim in order to look down to the Chassidim and the Rebbe, Rabbi Yosef Zvi Dushinsky.
The Dushinsky Rebbe: Rabbi Yosef Zvi Dushinsky
I wasn't planning to stay for too long, as I had made up many plans for that night. However, I have to say that although Dushinsky does not have the best Niggunim (songs), they do have the greatest singers. It was more than listening to a professional choir. Next to the room where the Tish takes place, they built a new synagogue. We had a look into it from upstairs and if anyone wants to see a great synagogue should definitely go to Dushinsky. The Aron HaKodesh is huge and on its left side, two special wooden chairs are placed. The bigger one is obviously for the Rebbe and the smaller one seems to be for the second man in Chassidut Dushinsky: for Rabbi Avraham Yitzchak Ullmann. Rabbi Ullmann is one of the most important figures in the Edah HaCharedit.
After about half an hour we left and walked through Yoel Street into Mea Shearim. Our first destination was the synagogue of the secret Edah group "Mishkenot HaRoim". Usually their two doors are wide open and I though I might be lucky. The door to the left was obviously the men's entrance. There is another door on the right which seemed to be the women;s entrance. We were standing in front of the building and thinking to go in or not.
At the same moment, some litvishe Yeshiva guys showed up and opened the men's door. A Chassid came out and didn't want to let them inside. They had to leave and walked away. Of course, we thought that the same might also apply to us. We walked away as well but couldn't stop thinking about the open women's entrance door.
After 100 meters we decided to go back. Actually my friend was more brave than me. We came back to the building and another Chassid walked out. I asked him if the other door is the women's entrance. He looked at me that replied that they do not have a Tish. He said it and disappeared.
Well, I do not recommend to anyone doing the same as we did after the Chassid walked away. We just walked into the second door. We climbed up some stairs but suddenly saw man'e clothes hanging there. We weren't so sure if this was really a women's entrance and decided to leave. Everything rather looked like a total men's society inside. I will definitely go back and ask some people. The thing I can say is that all kinds of male members of different Edah groups were going in and out. But Edah members only !!!
The chassidic groups of Toldot Aharon and Avraham Yitzchak did not have a Tish that night. We heard that the Rebbe of Avraham Yitzchak, Rabbi Shmuel Yaakov Kahn, went on a vacation to Mexico and won't have a Tish for another few months. If this is right I am really asking myself why especially he is going away all the time. Doesn't he have to take care of his Chassidim ? And even if not, there are plenty of Chassidim who do not have much money and hardly make a living. Why then is a Rebbe allowed to travel and waste so much money for himself ? The Rebbes of Belz, Slonim Jerusalem, Kretchnif Jerusalem or Dushinsky are hardly traveling.
Rather spontaneously we decided to visit some synagogues instead. Usually everything is open in Mea Shearim on Friday night. However, last Erev Shabbat everything seemed to be abandoned and people apparently went to sleep early. The synagogues of Sadigora and Kaliv were closed. Tchernobyl was open and busy but, as usual, the women's entrance was locked. This forces us to come back during the daytime. Nevertheless, we had a great long walk and I was completely finished when I finally came home.
This Friday night we are going to the Maariv service. The doors won't be locked because thousands of Chassidim will be praying at this place. I am talking about the huge synagogue of Chassidut GUR.
Friday, December 21, 2007
A busy Shabbat
B"H
Sometimes I am really jealous that the New Yorker have such an incredible choice of chassidic Tishes. On the other hand, New York is not Jerusalem and it is better to be here.
This Shabbat, I am planning to go to the synagogue of the unknown group Mishkenot HaRoim. The Mishkenot HaRoim keep themselves as a kind of secret organization. Very little is known about them. They are part of the anti - Zionist umbrella organization Edah HaCharedit in Mea Shearim. A few months ago, they organized a Yahrzeit service for the famous Neturei Karta head Rabbi Amram Blau (Yiddish: Bloi). Rabbi Blau passed away in 1974 and was a famous Jerusalem figure, as he fought against anything anti - religious.
I wanted to participate in the Yahrzeit service. Not because I agree with certain anti - State of Israel ideas, but because I was interested in seeing the group.
From the Mea Shearim posters (Fakshivilim), however, I learned that the memorial service only included the learning of Talmudic Mishnayot. This was it. In haredi circles this means "NO WOMEN" but only men.
I hope the Mishkenot HaRoim let me into their synagogue. Furthermore, I am planning to go to the Munkatch, Tchernobyl and Sadigora synagogues in Jerusalem.
Have a great Shabbat. Shabbat Shalom. Git Shabbes.
Pictures from the ultra - orthodox Mea Shearim / Jerusalem
Sometimes I am really jealous that the New Yorker have such an incredible choice of chassidic Tishes. On the other hand, New York is not Jerusalem and it is better to be here.
This Shabbat, I am planning to go to the synagogue of the unknown group Mishkenot HaRoim. The Mishkenot HaRoim keep themselves as a kind of secret organization. Very little is known about them. They are part of the anti - Zionist umbrella organization Edah HaCharedit in Mea Shearim. A few months ago, they organized a Yahrzeit service for the famous Neturei Karta head Rabbi Amram Blau (Yiddish: Bloi). Rabbi Blau passed away in 1974 and was a famous Jerusalem figure, as he fought against anything anti - religious.
I wanted to participate in the Yahrzeit service. Not because I agree with certain anti - State of Israel ideas, but because I was interested in seeing the group.
From the Mea Shearim posters (Fakshivilim), however, I learned that the memorial service only included the learning of Talmudic Mishnayot. This was it. In haredi circles this means "NO WOMEN" but only men.
I hope the Mishkenot HaRoim let me into their synagogue. Furthermore, I am planning to go to the Munkatch, Tchernobyl and Sadigora synagogues in Jerusalem.
Have a great Shabbat. Shabbat Shalom. Git Shabbes.
Pictures from the ultra - orthodox Mea Shearim / Jerusalem
Thursday, December 20, 2007
A Story from the Arizal
B"H
The wife of Rabbi Mordechai Machlis, Rabbanit Henny Machlis, very much likes to tell the following story on Shabbat:
It was at the time of the Arizal (Rabbi Yitzchak Luria, 1534 - 1572) in Safed.
There was a certain poor couple which one day decided to give G - d a present. They were thinking and thinking what they could give to G-d. Eventually they came to the conclusion to bake Lechem HaPanim (the shewbread from the Temple).
On a Friday morning they started to bake the Lechem HaPanim. They were singing and dancing through the kitchen, and their house was full of joy. An hour before Shabbat, the husband of the couple went to the synagogue and put the Lechem HaPanim into the Aron HaKodesh. The couple hoped that G - d would accept their present for Shabbat.
A little later, the rabbi of the synagogue found the Lechem HaPanim in the Aron and thought: Who could have been so crazy to put Shabbat challot into the Aron HaKodesh.
Finally he took the challot home.
In the middle of the night, the husband of the couple came back to the synagogue, checked the Aron and saw that the bread was gone. Happily he went home and told his wife that G - d had accepted their present.
From now on they did so every Friday. The house was full of joy and they were dancing around the kitchen table. And every Friday, the rabbi was wondering who had put the bread into the Aron. Until one Friday he decided to hide in the synagogue and see what is going on.
That's what he did and after a while he saw the man putting the Lechem HaPanim into the Aron. The rabbi jumped unto the man and said: "What are you doing here?"
The man replied that him and his wife baked the Lechem HaPanim as a Shabbat present for G - d.
You fool, replied the rabbi. Do you really think that G-d needs you presents ? Go home and take your challot with you.
Disappointed and broken came the man home to his wife and told her what had happened. They started crying.
A few days later, the Arizal came to the rabbi and told him that there was a decree in the heavenly court. The rabbi will die within a few days.
Why ? asked the rabbi the Arizal.
The Arizal answered: When the couple baked the Lechem HaPanim, there was so much joy in the upper worlds which had never been since the Temple was destroyed. And you just destroyed the couple's joy. That's why the heavenly court made its decision.
It is not known if the rabbi really died later on or if his Teshuva was accepted.
The wife of Rabbi Mordechai Machlis, Rabbanit Henny Machlis, very much likes to tell the following story on Shabbat:
It was at the time of the Arizal (Rabbi Yitzchak Luria, 1534 - 1572) in Safed.
There was a certain poor couple which one day decided to give G - d a present. They were thinking and thinking what they could give to G-d. Eventually they came to the conclusion to bake Lechem HaPanim (the shewbread from the Temple).
On a Friday morning they started to bake the Lechem HaPanim. They were singing and dancing through the kitchen, and their house was full of joy. An hour before Shabbat, the husband of the couple went to the synagogue and put the Lechem HaPanim into the Aron HaKodesh. The couple hoped that G - d would accept their present for Shabbat.
A little later, the rabbi of the synagogue found the Lechem HaPanim in the Aron and thought: Who could have been so crazy to put Shabbat challot into the Aron HaKodesh.
Finally he took the challot home.
In the middle of the night, the husband of the couple came back to the synagogue, checked the Aron and saw that the bread was gone. Happily he went home and told his wife that G - d had accepted their present.
From now on they did so every Friday. The house was full of joy and they were dancing around the kitchen table. And every Friday, the rabbi was wondering who had put the bread into the Aron. Until one Friday he decided to hide in the synagogue and see what is going on.
That's what he did and after a while he saw the man putting the Lechem HaPanim into the Aron. The rabbi jumped unto the man and said: "What are you doing here?"
The man replied that him and his wife baked the Lechem HaPanim as a Shabbat present for G - d.
You fool, replied the rabbi. Do you really think that G-d needs you presents ? Go home and take your challot with you.
Disappointed and broken came the man home to his wife and told her what had happened. They started crying.
A few days later, the Arizal came to the rabbi and told him that there was a decree in the heavenly court. The rabbi will die within a few days.
Why ? asked the rabbi the Arizal.
The Arizal answered: When the couple baked the Lechem HaPanim, there was so much joy in the upper worlds which had never been since the Temple was destroyed. And you just destroyed the couple's joy. That's why the heavenly court made its decision.
It is not known if the rabbi really died later on or if his Teshuva was accepted.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Looking for a Home
B"H
The issue I would like to point out here is only based on my personal experiences in Jerusalem. I cannot say if the same is happening outside Israel.
I have already mentioned the difficulties of converts to orthodox Judaism several times before. People from all over the world come to Bnei Brak or Jerusalem and convert.
The issue which caught my attention is that many of those converts afterwards decide to lead a haredi lifestyle. After their Beit Din they either join a chassidic group or the litvishe movement. According to my experience, most of the participants are male.
As you already expect me to mention, of course, Chabad has many newcomers. Converts as well as born Jews who became religious later on in their lives (Baalei Teshuva). There is a difference between both groups; converts have other reasons joining the Haredim than Baalei Teshuva have. Anyway, so far I would only like to write about the convert issue.
Last night I had a discussion with someone who has met many of such cases as well as I have, and we both came to the same conclusion. Of course, I am not a psychologist but in my opinion many converts feel some kind of homeless after completing their conversion.
First they have a goal which is converting to Judaism and especially passing the Beit Din (Rabbinical Court) and getting the certificate done. But suddenly they realize that they are alone in a foreign land (Israel). They don't have a Jewish family or relatives. They want to lead an orthodox lifestyle but feel completely lonely. Now what ?
For many of them, Chabad and further chassidic groups are becoming a kind of home and even a family replacement. The "new Jews" go to a chassidic group and suddenly there is this feeling of "togetherness" which they haven't felt for a long time. Here they find traditions they didn't have before and they decide to take over those traditions, as they have nothing else. The Rebbe is becoming a kind of a "father figure". And with this statement I do not only mean the Lubavitcher Rebbe.
But not only Chabad is offering a lot; other even extreme groups accept newcomers. Besides, whoever wants to join Chabad should know that from the outside Chabad is considered to be very open to everyone. After having a closer look you will realize that there is a limit for every newcomer. Here I only want to give the example of "Shidduchim". But this is the same in every other chassidic group. None of the new participants is getting a Shidduch with someone who was born into the group. Usually converts marry converts or Baalei Teshuva although people in Mea Shearim always like to show off with the "Amram Blau - Story" and wish to proof you wrong. Rabbi Amram Blau died in the 70ies and used to be the head of the local Neturei Karta. Later in his life, he married a French convert. This happened against the decree of leading Mea Shearim rabbis and, as a punishment, Rabbi Blau was forced to live in the Bnei Brak exile for one year.
It would be very interesting making a study about converts to Judaism joining chassidic groups. What kind of difficulties do they face in their daily lives and how do they deal with them ?
An important step being accepted is getting married quickly. Then you can build your own family and don't have to worry anymore about getting invitations for Shabbat somewhere else. Getting invited for Shabbat as a single is always a pain but many people just don't like to stay at home alone and making their own Kiddush. I heard from many families that they also see it as a pain inviting singles almost every Shabbat.
Once you are married and have children, it might be much easier to adjust and get integrated into society. Realistically speaking, the born Chassidim will always watch you and your kids. In that society (also litvish) everybody is watching the other and newcomers are a permanent object of suspicion. Not necessarily with Chabad but definitely with Vishnitz, Satmar, Belz or Toldot Aharon.
A short while ago a friend of mine told me about a Polish - German couple who converted, joined Satmar and now lives in the Batei Hungari backyard in Mea Shearim. Both of them got adjusted quickly and didn't have any problems learning Yiddish fast. It would be interesting talking to them.
In Judaism it is a Mitzwah to help a convert after his conversion. Make it easy and comfortable for him to feel at home in his new religion. Today, however, things are different and not every convert is really welcomed. There are different reasons for this. One probably is that many converts are simply fakes. Furthermore, haredi society today makes too many differences among each other. They sometimes judge each other to harsh like "He is not good enough or he is not good enough at all". He is in this Yeshiva and I am there, meaning I am better than him. Simply speaking, everybody sees himself above his neighbour and whoever is not like me, cannot be with me.
I cannot understand a convert to Judaism who decides to have such a radical change in his life and joining a more extreme chassidic group. Not only that he has to change his clothes or neighbourhood but many times you also have to change your friends. Not only change but leave the other ones who are not like you anymore behind. I met people who even dumped their Gentile family. More or less.
It seems that sometimes the convert wants to eradicate his entire former history and create a new one. Not always for his environment but at least for himself.
The issue I would like to point out here is only based on my personal experiences in Jerusalem. I cannot say if the same is happening outside Israel.
I have already mentioned the difficulties of converts to orthodox Judaism several times before. People from all over the world come to Bnei Brak or Jerusalem and convert.
The issue which caught my attention is that many of those converts afterwards decide to lead a haredi lifestyle. After their Beit Din they either join a chassidic group or the litvishe movement. According to my experience, most of the participants are male.
As you already expect me to mention, of course, Chabad has many newcomers. Converts as well as born Jews who became religious later on in their lives (Baalei Teshuva). There is a difference between both groups; converts have other reasons joining the Haredim than Baalei Teshuva have. Anyway, so far I would only like to write about the convert issue.
Last night I had a discussion with someone who has met many of such cases as well as I have, and we both came to the same conclusion. Of course, I am not a psychologist but in my opinion many converts feel some kind of homeless after completing their conversion.
First they have a goal which is converting to Judaism and especially passing the Beit Din (Rabbinical Court) and getting the certificate done. But suddenly they realize that they are alone in a foreign land (Israel). They don't have a Jewish family or relatives. They want to lead an orthodox lifestyle but feel completely lonely. Now what ?
For many of them, Chabad and further chassidic groups are becoming a kind of home and even a family replacement. The "new Jews" go to a chassidic group and suddenly there is this feeling of "togetherness" which they haven't felt for a long time. Here they find traditions they didn't have before and they decide to take over those traditions, as they have nothing else. The Rebbe is becoming a kind of a "father figure". And with this statement I do not only mean the Lubavitcher Rebbe.
But not only Chabad is offering a lot; other even extreme groups accept newcomers. Besides, whoever wants to join Chabad should know that from the outside Chabad is considered to be very open to everyone. After having a closer look you will realize that there is a limit for every newcomer. Here I only want to give the example of "Shidduchim". But this is the same in every other chassidic group. None of the new participants is getting a Shidduch with someone who was born into the group. Usually converts marry converts or Baalei Teshuva although people in Mea Shearim always like to show off with the "Amram Blau - Story" and wish to proof you wrong. Rabbi Amram Blau died in the 70ies and used to be the head of the local Neturei Karta. Later in his life, he married a French convert. This happened against the decree of leading Mea Shearim rabbis and, as a punishment, Rabbi Blau was forced to live in the Bnei Brak exile for one year.
It would be very interesting making a study about converts to Judaism joining chassidic groups. What kind of difficulties do they face in their daily lives and how do they deal with them ?
An important step being accepted is getting married quickly. Then you can build your own family and don't have to worry anymore about getting invitations for Shabbat somewhere else. Getting invited for Shabbat as a single is always a pain but many people just don't like to stay at home alone and making their own Kiddush. I heard from many families that they also see it as a pain inviting singles almost every Shabbat.
Once you are married and have children, it might be much easier to adjust and get integrated into society. Realistically speaking, the born Chassidim will always watch you and your kids. In that society (also litvish) everybody is watching the other and newcomers are a permanent object of suspicion. Not necessarily with Chabad but definitely with Vishnitz, Satmar, Belz or Toldot Aharon.
A short while ago a friend of mine told me about a Polish - German couple who converted, joined Satmar and now lives in the Batei Hungari backyard in Mea Shearim. Both of them got adjusted quickly and didn't have any problems learning Yiddish fast. It would be interesting talking to them.
In Judaism it is a Mitzwah to help a convert after his conversion. Make it easy and comfortable for him to feel at home in his new religion. Today, however, things are different and not every convert is really welcomed. There are different reasons for this. One probably is that many converts are simply fakes. Furthermore, haredi society today makes too many differences among each other. They sometimes judge each other to harsh like "He is not good enough or he is not good enough at all". He is in this Yeshiva and I am there, meaning I am better than him. Simply speaking, everybody sees himself above his neighbour and whoever is not like me, cannot be with me.
I cannot understand a convert to Judaism who decides to have such a radical change in his life and joining a more extreme chassidic group. Not only that he has to change his clothes or neighbourhood but many times you also have to change your friends. Not only change but leave the other ones who are not like you anymore behind. I met people who even dumped their Gentile family. More or less.
It seems that sometimes the convert wants to eradicate his entire former history and create a new one. Not always for his environment but at least for himself.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Ein Sof – The Infinite Hidden G - d
B"H
One of the basic principles of Judaism is the concept of an incomprehensible G – d. In Kabbalah G – d is called Ein Sof. For the first time, the name Ein Sof appeared in the writings of Rabbi Azriel of Gerona (1160 – 1238). From the year 1300, the name Ein Sof became very common among the Kabbalists.
Even if the name Ein Sof was introduced much later, it does not mean that this concept did not exist in Judaism before. In fact it did all the time. According to Kabbalah, we never speak about G – d and His inner essence but only about His will. With our human way of understanding we would never be able to comprehend G – d. It is completely beyond our human mind to grasp Him and His being. Ein Sof is an absolute perfect being without any definition. He shows Himself in a way which is beyond nature. Only through His finite creation we are able to know that there is a G – d. The creator of everything from nothing (Yesh Mi Ein). And only through His creation we can estimate the time He is there. This, however, does not mean that G – d wasn't there before His creation. Of course He was, as he has no beginning and no end.
The great kabbalistic master Rabbi Yitzchak Luria (1534 – 1572) even made a distinction between the different kinds of Ein Sof within the Ein Sof.
According to author of the famous kabbalistic work "Maarechet HaElohut" (approx. 13th century), the hidden side of G – d could not be called G – d but only the revealed side of Him. This extreme claim caused a lot of harsh criticism in the Jewish world, as the hidden G – d Ein Sof is seen as absolute reality.
The Arizal (Rabbi Yitzchak Luria) developed a complete new kabbalistic terminology. He identifies the Ein Sof with the Or HaEliyon. Before the creation of the world, only G – d and His inner light existed and filled out everything. The hidden G – d existed before any existence. He neither has a beginning nor an end and will exist forever.
Those kabbalistic concepts are to be understood as metaphors and not to be taken literally !!!
One of the basic principles of Judaism is the concept of an incomprehensible G – d. In Kabbalah G – d is called Ein Sof. For the first time, the name Ein Sof appeared in the writings of Rabbi Azriel of Gerona (1160 – 1238). From the year 1300, the name Ein Sof became very common among the Kabbalists.
Even if the name Ein Sof was introduced much later, it does not mean that this concept did not exist in Judaism before. In fact it did all the time. According to Kabbalah, we never speak about G – d and His inner essence but only about His will. With our human way of understanding we would never be able to comprehend G – d. It is completely beyond our human mind to grasp Him and His being. Ein Sof is an absolute perfect being without any definition. He shows Himself in a way which is beyond nature. Only through His finite creation we are able to know that there is a G – d. The creator of everything from nothing (Yesh Mi Ein). And only through His creation we can estimate the time He is there. This, however, does not mean that G – d wasn't there before His creation. Of course He was, as he has no beginning and no end.
The great kabbalistic master Rabbi Yitzchak Luria (1534 – 1572) even made a distinction between the different kinds of Ein Sof within the Ein Sof.
According to author of the famous kabbalistic work "Maarechet HaElohut" (approx. 13th century), the hidden side of G – d could not be called G – d but only the revealed side of Him. This extreme claim caused a lot of harsh criticism in the Jewish world, as the hidden G – d Ein Sof is seen as absolute reality.
The Arizal (Rabbi Yitzchak Luria) developed a complete new kabbalistic terminology. He identifies the Ein Sof with the Or HaEliyon. Before the creation of the world, only G – d and His inner light existed and filled out everything. The hidden G – d existed before any existence. He neither has a beginning nor an end and will exist forever.
Those kabbalistic concepts are to be understood as metaphors and not to be taken literally !!!
The Fast of Asarah Be' Tevet (10th Tevet)
B"H
Even if the Jews outside Israel don't really like to hear it, I cannot imagine that Jews abroad are able to commemorate certain events in Jewish history as authentic as we do in Israel. And especially in Jerusalem. The latest example was Chanukkah.
What do Jews who have never been to Jerusalem know about the Site of the Kotel (Western Wall), the Temple Mount and our city ? When you are standing right here in front of the sites where everything took place, you suddenly get a very different feeling and approach to the holidays.
The same is happening tomorrow with the Fast day of Asarah Be' Tevet. This Fast day is a rabbinic fast but has an immense historical meaning. This year, Asarah Be'Tevet is going to start tomorrow (Wednesday) morning.
On this day, the siege over Jerusalem by the Babylonians began. One of the greatest tragedy in Jewish history. Three years later, on Tisha Be'Av, the First Temple was destroyed. The 10th Tevet stands for endless suffering and destruction.
Generally both Temple destructions are considered as a G - dly punishment. During the times of the First Temple, the Jews participated in idol worship, sexual perversions and even sacrificed their children in the Tofet (a place near the todays' Cinemateq). The Tofet was one of the most horrifying sites in Jerusalem at that time. Even if the Jews believed in G - d, they misunderstood the principle of the sacrifices and thought that G - d favours childrens' sacrifices.
Not only the Temple was destroyed. With it disappeared the Aron HaKodesh with the tablets, prophecy, the Shechina hid itself more, and even the Shemen HaMishcha was gone. Today we do not have any prophecy but rather a Bat Kol which Rashi describes as an echo of a Heavenly voice.
Today many of us might consider the Asarah Be' Tevet as a kind of minor fast. "What does this all have to do with me and the problems today" ?
Leading Rabbis appointed the 10th of Tevet as a Holocaust Memorial Day. Kaddish is said for all the Jews whose date of death or the location of the grave is unknown. Many Haredim consider the Asarah Be' Tevet as the real Holocaust Memorial Day and not the one stipulated by the Knesset. This is one of the reasons why especially Haredim do not stand still when we hear the sirens.
Every year anew, this behaviour is causing harsh criticism but once you know their real reason, you can understand it. Their memorial day is Asarah Be' Tevet. One chassidic friend of mine once made a good point about the whole situation. She told me that the religious and particularly the haredi population does not need sirens or big shows. "What do you do anyway when you listen to the sirens", she asked me. You look around and get exited. We, on the other hand, sit down and say Tehillim".
What she said was actually very true and I agree that silent mourning is the better way.
It says in Talmud Taanit 30b that whoever mourn for Jerusalem will witness its rebuilding. Hence, the Ge'ulah.
In Jerusalem the fast begins tomorow morning at 5.16 am and end in the evening at 5.08 pm.
The 10th Tevet is a day of Teshuva and should lead our hearts to the realization to learn from the mistakes of our ancestors. Everybody should realize that the universe was only created for him (Talmud Sanhedrin 37a) and thus, each of us is responsible for his actions. Every Jew has a special purpose in life and among the Jewish people, and he has to fulfill this task. With his actions, he not only influences his generation but also the future generations until the coming of Meschiach.
Zom Kal - Have an easy Fast !!!
Even if the Jews outside Israel don't really like to hear it, I cannot imagine that Jews abroad are able to commemorate certain events in Jewish history as authentic as we do in Israel. And especially in Jerusalem. The latest example was Chanukkah.
What do Jews who have never been to Jerusalem know about the Site of the Kotel (Western Wall), the Temple Mount and our city ? When you are standing right here in front of the sites where everything took place, you suddenly get a very different feeling and approach to the holidays.
The same is happening tomorrow with the Fast day of Asarah Be' Tevet. This Fast day is a rabbinic fast but has an immense historical meaning. This year, Asarah Be'Tevet is going to start tomorrow (Wednesday) morning.
On this day, the siege over Jerusalem by the Babylonians began. One of the greatest tragedy in Jewish history. Three years later, on Tisha Be'Av, the First Temple was destroyed. The 10th Tevet stands for endless suffering and destruction.
Generally both Temple destructions are considered as a G - dly punishment. During the times of the First Temple, the Jews participated in idol worship, sexual perversions and even sacrificed their children in the Tofet (a place near the todays' Cinemateq). The Tofet was one of the most horrifying sites in Jerusalem at that time. Even if the Jews believed in G - d, they misunderstood the principle of the sacrifices and thought that G - d favours childrens' sacrifices.
Not only the Temple was destroyed. With it disappeared the Aron HaKodesh with the tablets, prophecy, the Shechina hid itself more, and even the Shemen HaMishcha was gone. Today we do not have any prophecy but rather a Bat Kol which Rashi describes as an echo of a Heavenly voice.
Today many of us might consider the Asarah Be' Tevet as a kind of minor fast. "What does this all have to do with me and the problems today" ?
Leading Rabbis appointed the 10th of Tevet as a Holocaust Memorial Day. Kaddish is said for all the Jews whose date of death or the location of the grave is unknown. Many Haredim consider the Asarah Be' Tevet as the real Holocaust Memorial Day and not the one stipulated by the Knesset. This is one of the reasons why especially Haredim do not stand still when we hear the sirens.
Every year anew, this behaviour is causing harsh criticism but once you know their real reason, you can understand it. Their memorial day is Asarah Be' Tevet. One chassidic friend of mine once made a good point about the whole situation. She told me that the religious and particularly the haredi population does not need sirens or big shows. "What do you do anyway when you listen to the sirens", she asked me. You look around and get exited. We, on the other hand, sit down and say Tehillim".
What she said was actually very true and I agree that silent mourning is the better way.
It says in Talmud Taanit 30b that whoever mourn for Jerusalem will witness its rebuilding. Hence, the Ge'ulah.
In Jerusalem the fast begins tomorow morning at 5.16 am and end in the evening at 5.08 pm.
The 10th Tevet is a day of Teshuva and should lead our hearts to the realization to learn from the mistakes of our ancestors. Everybody should realize that the universe was only created for him (Talmud Sanhedrin 37a) and thus, each of us is responsible for his actions. Every Jew has a special purpose in life and among the Jewish people, and he has to fulfill this task. With his actions, he not only influences his generation but also the future generations until the coming of Meschiach.
Zom Kal - Have an easy Fast !!!
Monday, December 17, 2007
Kabbalistic Thought from the 13th Century
B"H
True prayer brings the human intellect into communion with the "Active Intellect" "like a kiss", but from there it ascends even to union through pure thought intended to reach the First Cause – the Primeval Will and to stand before G – d Himself.
(Zeror HaMor, chapter 5)
The world of Atzilut is pure thought where no speech whatsoever exists. Only G - d.
True prayer brings the human intellect into communion with the "Active Intellect" "like a kiss", but from there it ascends even to union through pure thought intended to reach the First Cause – the Primeval Will and to stand before G – d Himself.
(Zeror HaMor, chapter 5)
The world of Atzilut is pure thought where no speech whatsoever exists. Only G - d.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Dancing around the TV
B"H
It is impossible to count all the people I have met since I became religious. When I started learning in a Yeshiva, I came in touch with so many people; friends took me to Shabbatot or we went to further Shiurim somewhere else. Suddenly I got to know many national religious and haredim including university professors. I learned how to speak to different people, how to behave. Sometimes it really turned out to be a cultural shock for someone like me not used to this kind of environment. However, I was surprised about myself how quickly I got adjusted and I definitely don't want to miss all the experiences.
The story I want to tell here has nothing to do with Chassidim but rather takes places in the national religious and litvishe world. The story might sound unimportant and quite common but this experience has been one of the most important in my life so far.
About ten years ago, I was invited to visit a certain acquaintance of mine in the national religious neighbourhood of Kiryat Moshe. I was in the middle of a serious religious crises and was about to go back to Germany for a while. To get things cleared out, so to speak.
When I arrived at the house of my acquaintance, let's call her B., I found out that her mother was visiting her as well. The children loved their grandmother so much that they didn't even go to school in order to play with her. The grandmother was only there for a few hours visit and she was playing enthusiastically with her grandchildren. They put a music video into the video machine and listened to children's songs. Suddenly granny and and the kids started dancing around the TV set. It was very funny to watch the whole scene.
Shortly after, the grandmother and me started a very intense discussion. Her daughter had told her that I speak German and it turned out that B.'s mother was actually born in Germany. Before the beginning of the Second World War, B.'s mother had left Germany as a young child together with her parents. They went to Palestine where they went to live in a religious Kibbutz. There, B.'s mother also met her later husband, a very strict religious man.
"I was so young", told me the grandmother. I didn't know anything about the world and hardly anything about the Jewish religion." She got married and had to follow the rules of her religious husband. She never openly complained and bore a few children. Her children turned out to be religious as well and even became haredi. One of her sons is a famous Jerusalem Posek.
"The first thing that I did when my husband died was buying myself a TV", she said. She started enjoying her life anew and was glad to get rid of the pressure. Of course, she still is religious but nothing is done by force anymore. Her children never accused their mother of having a more modern lifestyle now, and just accepted her as she was.
When I told her about my crises, she encouraged me to leave and look for different opportunities. At least to get things sorted out and a clear mind. This, however, doesn’t mean that I would totally leave religion. Instead I should learn how to deal with it and not jumping onto fanatic ideas or feeling guilty all the time.
"Your are still young and don't do the same mistakes as I did", B.'s mother told me. I will never forget her face when she said this to me. I could read all the disappointment of those years in her eyes. I didn't know whether I should feel sorry for her or not. Although she had a hard life, she got great children and grandchildren.
I wonder if she is still alive and might go over to visit B. and ask. I haven't been there for too long.
It is impossible to count all the people I have met since I became religious. When I started learning in a Yeshiva, I came in touch with so many people; friends took me to Shabbatot or we went to further Shiurim somewhere else. Suddenly I got to know many national religious and haredim including university professors. I learned how to speak to different people, how to behave. Sometimes it really turned out to be a cultural shock for someone like me not used to this kind of environment. However, I was surprised about myself how quickly I got adjusted and I definitely don't want to miss all the experiences.
The story I want to tell here has nothing to do with Chassidim but rather takes places in the national religious and litvishe world. The story might sound unimportant and quite common but this experience has been one of the most important in my life so far.
About ten years ago, I was invited to visit a certain acquaintance of mine in the national religious neighbourhood of Kiryat Moshe. I was in the middle of a serious religious crises and was about to go back to Germany for a while. To get things cleared out, so to speak.
When I arrived at the house of my acquaintance, let's call her B., I found out that her mother was visiting her as well. The children loved their grandmother so much that they didn't even go to school in order to play with her. The grandmother was only there for a few hours visit and she was playing enthusiastically with her grandchildren. They put a music video into the video machine and listened to children's songs. Suddenly granny and and the kids started dancing around the TV set. It was very funny to watch the whole scene.
Shortly after, the grandmother and me started a very intense discussion. Her daughter had told her that I speak German and it turned out that B.'s mother was actually born in Germany. Before the beginning of the Second World War, B.'s mother had left Germany as a young child together with her parents. They went to Palestine where they went to live in a religious Kibbutz. There, B.'s mother also met her later husband, a very strict religious man.
"I was so young", told me the grandmother. I didn't know anything about the world and hardly anything about the Jewish religion." She got married and had to follow the rules of her religious husband. She never openly complained and bore a few children. Her children turned out to be religious as well and even became haredi. One of her sons is a famous Jerusalem Posek.
"The first thing that I did when my husband died was buying myself a TV", she said. She started enjoying her life anew and was glad to get rid of the pressure. Of course, she still is religious but nothing is done by force anymore. Her children never accused their mother of having a more modern lifestyle now, and just accepted her as she was.
When I told her about my crises, she encouraged me to leave and look for different opportunities. At least to get things sorted out and a clear mind. This, however, doesn’t mean that I would totally leave religion. Instead I should learn how to deal with it and not jumping onto fanatic ideas or feeling guilty all the time.
"Your are still young and don't do the same mistakes as I did", B.'s mother told me. I will never forget her face when she said this to me. I could read all the disappointment of those years in her eyes. I didn't know whether I should feel sorry for her or not. Although she had a hard life, she got great children and grandchildren.
I wonder if she is still alive and might go over to visit B. and ask. I haven't been there for too long.
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