On Parshat Bamidbar and People running after outside Appearances

B”H

In his commentary on this week’s Parashat Bamidbar, the Chatam Sofer (Rabbi Moshe Schreiber, 1762 – 1839) quotes from the Midrash Rabbah stating that Har Sinai and Har Hamoriah are two opposites. Both mountains are not the highest and mightiest in the world but G – d chose Har Sinai for a special purpose and after the purpose was done, Har Sinai lost its holiness and became an ordinary mountain again. Har Hamoriah, on the other hand, has never lost its special meaning and the presence of G – d’s Shechinah. Although there is no Temple at the moment. 

G – d chose Har Hamoriah for a special mission. As we know, creation took place from the Even HaShtiah (Foundation Stone) at Har Hamoriah. When Adam Harishon and Chava were thrown out of Gan Eden, G – d placed them on Har Hamoriah. Here, Avraham wanted to sacrifice Yitzchak and here, Yaakov had his dream with the ladder.

Couldn’t have G – d chosen a different mountain in Israel ? How about the highest mountain ?

As a matter of fact, being the highest and mightiest doesn’t always stand for the best. Just look at us humans. In most cases, the strongest looking is not always the most powerful, intelligent and modest (humbled) person. On the contrary, as He may even be strong, his brain and modest behaviour is far left behind. I personally prefer intellectual and academic people compared to these brainless musclemen. 

The same with Har Hamoriah. It is not the highest mountain in Israel and it doesn’t look like deserving a special honour and attention but G – d is showing us that everything in this world has its purpose; and the purpose of the lowest object, animal or person can even reach higher dimensions than the accomplishment of the greatest hero.

Unfortunately too many people today, especially women, tend to search for their personal hero. As soon as they meet a guy they project all their subconscious ideas and desires into the other person (their hero). Tell a woman a great story about your male hero life as a soldier, fighter, Rambo, Terminator, etc. and those women with low self – esteem make their dumb choice and go for it. This doesn’t necessarily work in a religious Shidduch or with people following their intellect. However, these women making the dummy choice and run after heros don’t always realize that the main goal why they are behaving like that is the fear of loneliness (according to psychological reports). 

Do we need heros today ?

My personal opinion is that I neither need a soldier nor a Hollywood hero. Having a successful relationship means work. I know that from my past and, unfortunately, I obviously never took the time for working on a falling apart relationship. 

Furthermore, a relationship has to be based on reality and a, more or less, common goal. For what do I need a military hero when he turns out to be a dummy and has no clue who Einstein was ? I am not running after short pleasures but concentrate on a serious relationship. Therefore those people running after the outside appearance of a person rather disgust me and eventually those people will turn out to be very lonely. 

Any person in this world has the potential of being a hero. There is no need for a uniform unless in order to attract some emotional disturbed women. 

I personally don't like the expression HERO but when it comes to it, your neighbour, the sick person suffering in hospital, the child taking care of her mother, the beggar in the street searching for empty bottles, the handicapped, the Rabbi helping the needy, a family providing Shabbat hospitality, a mother searching for food for her children in the garbage, all of them are heros of life.