There are those Jews who were born frum and they simply keep the Mitzvot because they were taught so. A young religious woman once told me that she has never thought about desecrating Shabbat because she had always kept Shabbat. Why should she have a desire for Chillul Shabbat ?
On the other hand, there are those Jews growing up secular but, later on in their lives, decided to become religious. I am not going into the subject of how religious. Lets just say RELIGIOUS.
As a born frummie, you are used to many things and you don't even ask why you do such and such. You just do and that's it.
All my life I have been asking and, many times, asking too much.:-) I cannot help it and just don't overlook or ignore things I see.
There is this book "Off - The - Derech" by Faranak Margolese I am reading at the moment. Mrs Margolese makes an important but simple point: Why do quite a few young Jews run away from religion and the life of Mitzvot ? Because they had negative experiences with frum Jews. Either with their parents, their teachers, their classmates, friends or even Rabbis.
When you are a religious Jew and see other Jews messing around or acting against the Torah, you get fed up. Religious Jews should be an example for Torah life but, in many cases, they are just the opposite. Many of them lie, cheat, steal or abuse just like anybody else. They are rude to you because you may not fulfill their expectations. Religious classmates beat each other and gossip around.
After a while, you stop seeing the difference between G - d and those religious Jews who don't behave too religious. You don't want to be like them so you cannot be religious, as those false frummies call themselves religious. You hate everything they do. When they study Torah, you cannot. When they eat kosher, you cannot.
It takes a lot of strength not to blame the entire Jewish religion because of the fact that various so - called religious Jews fail. You have to concentrate on G - d and not on those people. This is very hard and, many times, I am falling into this trap myself. Nevertheless, what you have to keep in mind is that those corrupt people cheating, yelling at you and making you feel like an idiot, are actually causing a Chillul Hashem.